Peaceful!

Its funny what the meaning of a name means, how strange that many people are their names. It makes you think everyone should be named with much thought & care. Even if you are your name it is still easy to mess it up. Your name is not only yours but your families as well how do you treat it? How do you treat yourself? Cherish your name.

How have you given your will your life & and all you are to God? In the book I am reading ( A Shepherd Looks @ Psalm 23) I am in the Chapter that talks about "He Leadeth me in the Paths of Righteousness for His Name's sake". It talks about where is God leading you to are you giving your whole self? Are you laying your will down to Him and all that he has for you? I know that as Christan's we often forget who we are serving, we get caught up in the normal every day busyness that surrounds us. We get following a certain path and stay on it, Because like sheep we are creatures of habit. But I don't want that. All my life I have been taught that we need to lead the flock we should never just follow what everyone else is doing. Yet how do you do that without getting a big head and thinking you are better, or cause you have Christ that you aren't accountable to anyone else.

I know that my heart has always been to serve, somehow I have been born with a pull that I feel horrible with myself if I don't help out in some way that I need to be helping out somehow, and if I am not I feel really bad. Yet because of all that I have found that I don't want to be in the front I don't want center stage I am much more comfortable being in the back round and serving. I have found it very hard to push myself out from behind and put myself in the front.
I know that their is a balance and that I need to find it. How? what can I do to serve yet also lead?

I know that God has shaped ever part of my life and continues to every day. It is interesting to look back and see all that he has done to change me. Little me always bossy have grow up and still am bossy ha ha. I was shy and scared of life, and God said go into the working world. I know that working in the world started the chain of events that would change of me. Thanks to my wonderful parents who instructed and an incredible Father that knew that I could do it. I still can't believe that God has brought me across the world into Europe to live for 4 months. Wow !

I don't always start these with any thought to what I am going to write, yet when I get going it just keeps coming. I have never been good with words and when I put them down they actually make sense. I can state things that I never knew that I needed to say and feel so much better for it. I also don't have my sister to be my sounding board for all my thoughts.